I sometimes dream my husband, Todd, is calling for me at night. I wake and check the time. If it’s after 5 a.m., I know his nighttime caregiver has left, so I check on him to see if he needs to be turned, have a limb adjusted, or an itch…
Joyful Sorrow — Kristin Neva
Kristin Neva is an author, mother of two, and caregiver for her husband, Todd, who was diagnosed with ALS in 2010 when he was 39 years old. Knowing they would need family support, they moved to Upper Michigan and built an accessible home on property next to Kristin’s childhood home. Kristin enjoys spending time outdoors, especially on the shore of Lake Superior in the summer. Todd no longer has use of his limbs, but he stays active working on projects on his computer using adaptive technology. They try to find joy in the midst of sorrow as Todd’s health declines.
Featured Post
Wake me up if Todd is in distress,” I said to his nighttime caregiver. “Of course,” she replied. It’s not something I typically say to one of my husband’s regular caregivers, but I felt on edge. I said good night and tried to get some rest, but my mind was…
Looking back over the course of more than a decade of my husband, Todd, having ALS, I’m struck with how hard we worked to maintain some sense of normalcy, even after he was paralyzed. We joined a Bible study with a small group of people from our church, and we…
We had another close call last week. I was out mowing the fields while a nursing assistant was caring for my husband, Todd. She was one of his first caregivers after he lost his ability to walk and bathe himself due to ALS. At the time, Todd still…
“Two are better than one,/ because they have a good return for their labor:/ If either of them falls down,/ one can help the other up./ But pity anyone who falls/ and has no one to help them up.” — Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 (NIV) Because my husband, Todd, has…
My 16-year-old-daughter, Sara, watched a TED Talk by Angela Duckworth on grit in her AP Language class. Sara was not impressed. “I don’t want to have grit,” she declared. Many of her high school friends are taking college math classes while she is on the standard math track. She sees…
On my daily walk, I take a detour from the field and into the woods because I’m on the hunt for birch bark and pine cones. It’s the season for collecting natural accents to use on my Christmas wreaths, which I’ll start making in a month. I sell them…
After college, I worked at an after-school youth program. I loved my work, and I made ends meet on my modest salary. I met and married my husband, Todd, who had a good job, so when we started a family, I decided to stay home with our children. I…
This past weekend, my husband, Todd, coached our son, Isaac, in making and installing a shelf in our daughter’s bedroom. It was a corner shelf with an obtuse angle, so they had to measure the angle, cut the boards to fit, and join the two halves of the shelf together.
Last week at Walgreens, the cashier asked me if I got the senior discount. I’ve never been asked that before, but perhaps the stress of caring for my disabled husband has finally caught up to me. “How old do you need to be to be considered a senior?” I asked.
As summer comes to an end, we’ve recently passed a couple milestones. Our son, Isaac, celebrated his 13th birthday at the end of August. That was not something we thought my husband, Todd, would live to see when he was diagnosed with ALS. Isaac was only 9 months old…
Power wheelchairs are expensive, and while Medicare covers the base cost, many beneficial features are an additional out-of-pocket expense for those already facing the high cost of living with ALS in the United States. Nine years ago, we began the process of ordering a power wheelchair for…
“Are you ever going to go faster, Mom?” my 12-year-old son, Isaac, asked earlier this summer when I caught up to him at the bottom of a hill, where he was waiting for me. I enjoy mountain biking with him. At times I ease off the brakes on a smooth…
Explore More Columns
Discussion
Discussion
Discussion