Joyful Sorrow - a Column by Kristin Neva

patients, strength, bittersweet Kristin Neva is an author, mother of two, and caregiver for her husband, Todd, who was diagnosed with ALS in 2010 when he was 39 years old. Knowing they would need family support, they moved to Upper Michigan and built an accessible home on property next to Kristin’s childhood home. Kristin enjoys spending time outdoors, especially on the shore of Lake Superior in the summer. Todd no longer has use of his limbs, but he stays active working on projects on his computer using adaptive technology. They try to find joy in the midst of sorrow as Todd’s health declines.

Marking the 15-year anniversary of an ALS diagnosis

A week ago Wednesday, on the 15th anniversary of his ALS diagnosis, my husband, Todd, had a dentist appointment. He dreaded the outing because he’s paralyzed below the neck, uses a power wheelchair, and needs breathing support. He hadn’t rolled outside of the house, not even to…

Finding comfort in AI: Using ChatGPT to cope with ALS grief

Someone in an online caregiver support group posted that they were finding value in using ChatGPT as a therapist. Other caregivers chimed in, saying they also turn to the artificial intelligence chatbot for support and find it surprisingly helpful. One person suggested prompting it to “respond like a counselor” or…

Seeing the rhythm of my life as I navigate ALS

I keep playing a new song by Bon Iver. Once my husband, Todd, who has ALS, is set up on his computer after breakfast, I turn my attention to household chores until he needs my help again. My new find, “There’s a Rhythmn” [sic], has a reflective,…

Finding humor lifts our spirits in life with ALS

My husband, Todd, and I work New York Times puzzles while we eat breakfast. Because Todd is paralyzed due to ALS, I feed him. We start with the Spelling Bee puzzle, which offers seven letters for you to make words with. There is always at least one word that…

In living with ALS, I’m OK and not OK

In the opening stanza of “For When People Ask,” poet Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer writes: “I want a word that means okay and not okay, more than that: a word that means devastated and stunned with joy. I want the word that says I feel it all all at…