Joyful Sorrow - a Column by Kristin Neva

I planned an end-of-summer trip to spend time with my daughter and friends near Milwaukee, Wisconsin, where my husband, Todd, and I lived when he was diagnosed with ALS 16 years ago. I needed time away from being constantly on duty. The trip also gave me a new perspective…

My husband, Todd, and I recently finished watching the NBC series “The Good Place,” a comedy that explores some of life’s big questions about meaning. In the season three finale, the character Eleanor Shellstrop searches for the answer that will make everything make sense as she tries to…

My brother and his family visited from out of town for a few days, so I planned a couple activities away from home and hired a caregiver for my husband, Todd, who has ALS and is paralyzed. Now that his neck is very weak and he needs noninvasive…

Last week, the winds shifted, bringing plumes of smoke from wildfires in Minnesota’s Boundary Waters and Canada across Lake Superior to Michigan’s Keweenaw Peninsula. While our lives and homes are not at risk, unlike those in the areas burning, the smoke still affects daily life. It’s especially concerning for people…

ALS has taken a lot, but I am thankful I still have my partner in parenting. Our teenage son came home with an injury one morning last week, and I took one look at the gash on his face and thought it needed stitches. My husband, Todd, concurred.

I walked with our dog, Comet, on a trail in the woods behind our house. The woods felt cool out of the hot sun. Light filtered through the trees overhead as I breathed in the rich smell of summer earth and pine. A ruffed grouse crossed our path, and…

My husband, Todd, and I sat on the patio on a perfect summer day in Michigan’s Upper Peninsula. It was in the 70s and sunny, with a brisk wind that kept the mosquitoes and biting flies away. We looked out beyond our backyard to a field that had been a…

A couple months ago, I planted zinnia and strawflower seeds in two plastic bins and set them in the sunlight under our patio window in my dining room. I’ve grown vegetables from seeds in the past, but never flowers. Vegetables feel practical because food is necessary to sustain life, while…

I’ve recently started meeting with a therapist through telehealth to try to better cope with life as my husband’s caregiver. Todd is homebound now, so we have been more isolated, which is hard on my mental health. It’s stressful to always be on duty, ready to move an arm,…

Last summer, a large limb on our old mountain ash died, and this spring, our teenage son cut it off, leaving only one limb coming out of the stump of a once beautiful tree. “Is it time to take it down?” I asked my husband, Todd. “I think so,” he…