A visit to my skin doctor becomes an ALS milestone moment

'Old lady bumps' earned are 'old lady bumps' worth keeping

Dagmar Munn avatar

by Dagmar Munn |

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Last week I visited my dermatologist for my annual skin exam and when it was over I left his office with a brand new perspective about my ALS.

I’m quite diligent about my annual medical exams — eye exams, regular ALS clinic visits, dental care, and in this case, the dermatologist. That’s because during my professional years teaching wellness, the importance of regular health screening was drilled into my psyche.

Maintaining my skin health holds a special place. That’s because sunscreen wasn’t widely available until the early 1980s and I’m part of the generation who, during the ’60s and ’70s, used tanning oils and lotions to purposely tan our skin. Heck, I’ll even admit to using the now-discredited combination of baby oil and iodine. Horrors!

So, ever since I learned about the risks of unprotected sun exposure, I’ve been a religious user of sunscreen. But lurking in the dark corners of my mind has been the fear that all those years of shameless sun exposure would someday be avenged in the form of skin cancer.

Surprisingly, that particular anxiety gremlin resurfaced the day I was told I had ALS. No lie, my first thought was, “Thank goodness my serious condition is only ALS and not skin cancer.” Of course, at the time, I had no concept about how serious ALS was. It’s a challenging and humbling disease, and one I’ve been trying to learn to live with.

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What my dermatologist told me, and what I told my dermatologist

Keeping my anxieties in check, I waited patiently while my dermatologist assessed my skin. At the end of the exam, he proclaimed, “Your skin looks just fine, I’ll see you back here in a year.”

A wave of relief washed over me. But before my anxiety gremlins disappeared completely, I pointed to several minuscule bumps dotting my arms and legs. “But what about these?” I asked.

Naturally, before the appointment I had already Googled “skin bumps” and watched numerous YouTube videos. I learned that the tiny bumps were common, they appear on the skin of older people, and are benign. One YouTuber referred to them as “old lady bumps.”

My doctor set his magnifying glass over them and assured me they were OK. Pointing to a spray can on a nearby tray, he offered to zap them away.

My gaze alternated between the spray can, my bumps, and back again. I’ve had cryotherapy before to treat my skin’s various doodads and it doesn’t bother me, but it does leave a large red welt that lingers for several days. Pondering the number of tiny bumps we were now considering, I imagined I’d leave the office looking like a well-used target practice poster.

Time stood still as more thoughts flooded in. I was 59 when I was diagnosed with ALS and I’m 72 now, I am an old lady, I told myself. I’m proud to have made it this far. I felt gratitude for my friends and family, and all the medical providers who’ve supported me these past 14 years. I’ve earned my old lady bumps. Time is precious and every year I’m living beyond the dismal prognosis for ALS is a milestone year.

“Nah,” I answered, “Thanks, I’ll just live with them.”

And on the drive home, I kept repeating to myself, “I’m doing OK,” learning to live well while living with ALS.


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