ALS has compromised the breathing of my husband, Todd, to the point where his positioning — unless he is using the Astral noninvasive ventilator — can mean the difference between being able to breathe or not. We only realized how bad it was a couple of weeks ago when we…
Joyful Sorrow — Kristin Neva
Kristin Neva is an author, mother of two, and caregiver for her husband, Todd, who was diagnosed with ALS in 2010 when he was 39 years old. Knowing they would need family support, they moved to Upper Michigan and built an accessible home on property next to Kristin’s childhood home. Kristin enjoys spending time outdoors, especially on the shore of Lake Superior in the summer. Todd no longer has use of his limbs, but he stays active working on projects on his computer using adaptive technology. They try to find joy in the midst of sorrow as Todd’s health declines.
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I planned an end-of-summer trip to spend time with my daughter and friends near Milwaukee, Wisconsin, where my husband, Todd, and I lived when he was diagnosed with ALS 16 years ago. I needed time away from being constantly on duty. The trip also gave me a new perspective…
I set my husband, Todd, up on his computer with his HeadMouse and sip-and-puff clicker. ALS has compromised his breathing, so I put on his noninvasive ventilator. I call my mom, who lives next door. She will keep her mobile phone in her pocket. If Todd needs anything, he…
Our daughter, Sara, is working on several pieces for an upcoming choir festival. One selection is the song “My New Philosophy” from the musical “You’re a Good Man, Charlie Brown.” The other evening, as our family gathered for dinner, Sara sang the lyrics in which the character Sally tries…
I’ve been worried about leaving my husband, Todd, who has ALS, alone after his close call with his breathing last week, but he said he would be fine while I ran to town. I needed to pick the kids up from school and take our daughter to a dentist…
In “12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos,” Jordan Peterson writes, “People can survive through much pain and loss. But to persevere they must see the good in Being. If they lose that, they are truly lost.” Now that my husband, Todd, has ALS, I am more attuned…
“Kristin, I need my eyes wiped again,” my husband, Todd, calls from his office. I had just put drops in his eyes 20 minutes ago, hoping to address the incessant itchiness he was experiencing, and now we are back at it again. I get up from my desk, grab a…
My husband, Todd, and I realized that massage could be beneficial for him even before he was diagnosed with ALS. Before we knew why his left arm was weak, I would massage his bicep and forearm, which helped him to better use it. Sometime after the diagnosis, his legs began…
I was struck by the wording in an advertisement in Quest magazine, a publication of the Muscular Dystrophy Association, that invited people “coping with amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS)” to participate in an observational study. I think of “coping” as not only dealing with something difficult, but doing so…
On New Year’s Eve, I took our kids and their friends bowling. My husband, Todd, who has ALS and is paralyzed, stayed home and used his computer. As we arrived at the bowling alley, I received a text from Todd saying that he needed my help with his…
It feels like a win when we can figure out how to include my husband, Todd, in game nights. He is paralyzed because of amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS), so any game that requires writing or moving is a challenge. That would include most games, but we can make some…
“How am I supposed to drive when I can’t see anything?” my nearly 16-year-old daughter asked. Sara and I were logging night-driving hours, which are required before she can take the second segment of driver’s education in January. She already has 12 hours behind the wheel, mostly during the day,…
We decorated for Christmas this past weekend. The kids and I went out into the woods, and my 12-year-old son, Isaac, cut down a balsam fir. My 15-year-old daughter, Sara, carried it back to our house, and we put it in the tree stand in the living room. When we…
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